I've been thinking rather fervently lately: If I could single out an event to convince myself that a god exists, what would that be?
Surprisingly, the answer is ... nothing. No, I'm not going to state "oh, I can't pinpoint just one single event, God reveals Himself to me in many ways..."
That's ridiculous. (I used to differ...)
In fact, I'm going so far as to retract the statement I made in my previous post on God's gift of choice --- I'm having doubts over the matter, but that is another issue.
The point is...I can't recall any event where I could say with utmost confidence that it proved (at least to me) that God exists. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I DON'T believe in the existence of a god, or God.
That isn't true.
What I actually mean is that my faith is shaken from time to time by this question....and let's face it: Faith without a basis is pointless.
When you jump off a plane, your faith in the parachute is sustained by the fact that you have seen it work before. When you assign a task to a team member, your faith in him is because of something he had done before. Faith needs to be accompanied...no....SUSTAINED....by a basis.
After some soul-searching, I've arrived at the conclusion that all Christians, perhaps maybe all subscribers to religion, need to possess that one incident that convicts them of the religion's 'realness'. I fail to have mine.
Why is this so important?
In any circumstance, especially dire situations, we need to cling on to that hope that our god is able to bring us out of it... That the god we believe in has something in store for us after this life... That what we see and do for our faith is recognized and acknowledged and will not be in vain.
EVERYTHING boils down to the conviction that the god you believe in exists, otherwise, it is all naught.
It is the basis...and I'm still trying to find mine.
Sure, there have been situations where it might have seemed that God was there...but there is always the danger of attributing everything that happens to God. In particular, it removes and contradicts one of the most fundamental principles of Christianity --- Choice.
As it is, most of the situations that I've attributed to God can be easily explained away with other (plausible) reasons like: Coincidences, Luck, etc... Hardly a good argument for the intervention of a supreme being.
So I've made a pact (a silly one) with God....
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Godlike powers.....
"To see a world in a grain of sand,
And a heaven in a wildflower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour."
- An excerpt from "Auguries of Innocence" by William Blake.
Although the generally perceived meaning of this poem speaks of the concept of microcosm - in which vast truths can be garnered from simple things...Every time I read it, it gives me this god-like feeling...to have so much power....
Anyway, I'm presently squishing the ants in my room and I kinda feel bad for the little critters. I've already told them... nicely... not to come but they continue to persist in their own unrelenting fashion...I mean, what else can I do? Therefore, I squish.
By the way, have you ever tried to perceive life from an ant's point of view? We live in a 3-dimensional world and are all familiar with the 3 different axes...
However, ants differ by the fact that they are constrained (by the laws of physics, more specifically --- Van Der Waals forces) to live in a purely 2D world!
(It is at this juncture that I define ants as your normal house ants and not those flying kinds...)
Imagine --- when you squish their friends, all they see is a HUGE rod coming down from the heavens and the next moment, their friends are dead. What makes it even worse is that there is seemingly NOWHERE to hide or run to...
They can run for a long distance, think they're safe but whaddya know? The giant rod sees all and knows all...and eliminates them too....
In a nutshell, WE ARE GOD to them. We can give them food, provide shelter and most importantly, mete punishment out. We are all-seeing and all-knowing. We can be benevolent or pure evil.
If you have read the book "Flatland: A Romance of Many Dimensions" by Edwin Abbott (I highly recommend it), you'd probably have a better perspective of this idea. Perhaps God is similar to the being of higher dimensions....perhaps He exists in 4D...
That would easily explain why He is able to be omnipresent, omnipotent and omniscient....but not His nature of love.
Like what I shared about the ants, it really isn't easy to have so much power and not wield it indiscriminately....Sure, I know the ants are just doing their job...but they're irritating so I kill them all the same.
How much discipline and self-control must someone have to not only NOT kill the people who have hurt him so badly....but also to take the time to actually BOTHER about their small, insignificant lives...?
Guess only He knows...
For a short look into flatland, have a look at this 5min video, it's pretty informative...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWyTxCsIXE4
And a heaven in a wildflower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour."
- An excerpt from "Auguries of Innocence" by William Blake.
Although the generally perceived meaning of this poem speaks of the concept of microcosm - in which vast truths can be garnered from simple things...Every time I read it, it gives me this god-like feeling...to have so much power....
Anyway, I'm presently squishing the ants in my room and I kinda feel bad for the little critters. I've already told them... nicely... not to come but they continue to persist in their own unrelenting fashion...I mean, what else can I do? Therefore, I squish.
By the way, have you ever tried to perceive life from an ant's point of view? We live in a 3-dimensional world and are all familiar with the 3 different axes...
However, ants differ by the fact that they are constrained (by the laws of physics, more specifically --- Van Der Waals forces) to live in a purely 2D world!
(It is at this juncture that I define ants as your normal house ants and not those flying kinds...)
Imagine --- when you squish their friends, all they see is a HUGE rod coming down from the heavens and the next moment, their friends are dead. What makes it even worse is that there is seemingly NOWHERE to hide or run to...
They can run for a long distance, think they're safe but whaddya know? The giant rod sees all and knows all...and eliminates them too....
In a nutshell, WE ARE GOD to them. We can give them food, provide shelter and most importantly, mete punishment out. We are all-seeing and all-knowing. We can be benevolent or pure evil.
If you have read the book "Flatland: A Romance of Many Dimensions" by Edwin Abbott (I highly recommend it), you'd probably have a better perspective of this idea. Perhaps God is similar to the being of higher dimensions....perhaps He exists in 4D...
That would easily explain why He is able to be omnipresent, omnipotent and omniscient....but not His nature of love.
Like what I shared about the ants, it really isn't easy to have so much power and not wield it indiscriminately....Sure, I know the ants are just doing their job...but they're irritating so I kill them all the same.
How much discipline and self-control must someone have to not only NOT kill the people who have hurt him so badly....but also to take the time to actually BOTHER about their small, insignificant lives...?
Guess only He knows...
For a short look into flatland, have a look at this 5min video, it's pretty informative...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWyTxCsIXE4
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Seek and Ye Shall Find...
Ah, the perils of coding (In my case --- Matlab)....
Every coder worth his salt would have gone through the inundating task of sifting through lines and lines of seemingly identical codes to find that one. particular. irritating. line of code causing the anomaly in his programme.
Talk about a huge waste of time!
I recently spent 4 hours searching through my Matlab codes because my results didn't seem to tally...only to find after checking and re-checking everything that the mistake stemmed from a error in the formula provided by the original theorist whose work I'm using.
(And you'd expect published papers to be more accurate...)
Anyway, the process kinda wore me out a bit... My stomach is growling, my eyes are weary and my shoulders are aching from the weird keyboard position. Yet, this entire process reminds me of the parable of the lost coin and how the said woman rummaged through her entire house in search of that one missing coin. Also, just like me, she couldn't contain her enormous joy and commensurately large mouth and went around telling everyone about it.
For most people, this parable speaks of our importance to Him and how He wants to find us at all costs. However, the recent incident that I just shared revealed to me something else... that once we are found, it is a cause for rejoicing of the greatest extent and everyone in heaven ain't gonna shut their mouth about it. Guess it's the same when one repents and goes back to Him.
It such a pleasure to know that I am so treasured.
"In the same way, there is more joy in heaven over one lost sinner who repents and returns to God than over ninety-nine others who are righteous and haven't strayed away!" - Luke 15:7
Every coder worth his salt would have gone through the inundating task of sifting through lines and lines of seemingly identical codes to find that one. particular. irritating. line of code causing the anomaly in his programme.
Talk about a huge waste of time!
I recently spent 4 hours searching through my Matlab codes because my results didn't seem to tally...only to find after checking and re-checking everything that the mistake stemmed from a error in the formula provided by the original theorist whose work I'm using.
(And you'd expect published papers to be more accurate...)
Anyway, the process kinda wore me out a bit... My stomach is growling, my eyes are weary and my shoulders are aching from the weird keyboard position. Yet, this entire process reminds me of the parable of the lost coin and how the said woman rummaged through her entire house in search of that one missing coin. Also, just like me, she couldn't contain her enormous joy and commensurately large mouth and went around telling everyone about it.
For most people, this parable speaks of our importance to Him and how He wants to find us at all costs. However, the recent incident that I just shared revealed to me something else... that once we are found, it is a cause for rejoicing of the greatest extent and everyone in heaven ain't gonna shut their mouth about it. Guess it's the same when one repents and goes back to Him.
It such a pleasure to know that I am so treasured.
"In the same way, there is more joy in heaven over one lost sinner who repents and returns to God than over ninety-nine others who are righteous and haven't strayed away!" - Luke 15:7
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Choice...or Lack Thereof.
Are we really free to make the choice between heaven or hell?
Some might argue that although the freedom of choice is technically there, the offered options coerces one to actually make the more logical choice (I'm assuming heaven here, shouldn't be that far off), thus depriving any sane person the actual luxury to 'choose'.
Perhaps, some might add, it might make more sense if the outcomes of both choices had equal incentives.
I would think this conundrum also stems from the fact that it is widely recognized --- pardon what's about to come --- that it is much easier and enjoyable to indulge in the various sins that would lead to the pathway of the netherworld then it is to climb up the arduous route towards heaven. C'mon, being a goody-two-shoes? It's boring...
To quote two classic songs that frames up this picture of heaven and hell nicely...It really is a 'Highway to Hell' and a 'Stairway to Heaven'. (Told you to pardon me...)
Anyway, to digress a little, we have in Physics what we term as 'a priori' postulates. To use the very succinct explanation of Dictionary.com, it means "known to be true independently of or in advance of experience of the subject matter; requiring no evidence for its validation or support".
Alright, what is the relevance of it to the entire discussion? We'll find out in a bit...
Some might argue that although the freedom of choice is technically there, the offered options coerces one to actually make the more logical choice (I'm assuming heaven here, shouldn't be that far off), thus depriving any sane person the actual luxury to 'choose'.
Perhaps, some might add, it might make more sense if the outcomes of both choices had equal incentives.
I would think this conundrum also stems from the fact that it is widely recognized --- pardon what's about to come --- that it is much easier and enjoyable to indulge in the various sins that would lead to the pathway of the netherworld then it is to climb up the arduous route towards heaven. C'mon, being a goody-two-shoes? It's boring...
To quote two classic songs that frames up this picture of heaven and hell nicely...It really is a 'Highway to Hell' and a 'Stairway to Heaven'. (Told you to pardon me...)
Anyway, to digress a little, we have in Physics what we term as 'a priori' postulates. To use the very succinct explanation of Dictionary.com, it means "known to be true independently of or in advance of experience of the subject matter; requiring no evidence for its validation or support".
Alright, what is the relevance of it to the entire discussion? We'll find out in a bit...
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Slaying the Minotaur.
The oft mentioned labyrinth always brings to mind (at least to mine) the picture of the slayed Minotaur. The beast, killed by Theseus, was probably a job harder than finding his way out of the wicked maze.
Yet, whenever people talk about the labyrinth, the ingenuity of Ariadne and her idea of the usage of string for navigation within the walls are always the most important aspects of the entire myth.
Stop and think for a awhile now...
You're Theseus and after a long, mind-numbingly boring walk, you find yourself face to face with a demigod --- the beast Minotaur. After thrashing it out, getting your ass severely demarcated with his nasty horns and contemplating the horrors of a rabies shot, you finally conquer the hulking bovine.
You then follow the thread back out and head back home. Of course, you forget to change sails and cause your dad to die, but that isn't the point.
The point is --- you want people to recognize the courage and immensely intense fight you had. Alas! People only remember you...following the thread back out.
The crux of my inane rambling is, that many-a-time, the tough parts of life are in the execution of decisions but we are so caught up in the journey and the planning of the route that will take us to those decisions that they become the priority and mission itself.
It is then the same with my walk with God. Like Martha, I'm so caught up and entwined with how to go about being a good christian that I forget that it isn't WHAT I DO that makes me a christian but WHO sustains me that is.
The christian journey is not solely and mainly on how many good deeds I've done. No, it is about the relationship that I have with He that is truly what counts.
Yet, whenever people talk about the labyrinth, the ingenuity of Ariadne and her idea of the usage of string for navigation within the walls are always the most important aspects of the entire myth.
Stop and think for a awhile now...
You're Theseus and after a long, mind-numbingly boring walk, you find yourself face to face with a demigod --- the beast Minotaur. After thrashing it out, getting your ass severely demarcated with his nasty horns and contemplating the horrors of a rabies shot, you finally conquer the hulking bovine.
You then follow the thread back out and head back home. Of course, you forget to change sails and cause your dad to die, but that isn't the point.
The point is --- you want people to recognize the courage and immensely intense fight you had. Alas! People only remember you...following the thread back out.
The crux of my inane rambling is, that many-a-time, the tough parts of life are in the execution of decisions but we are so caught up in the journey and the planning of the route that will take us to those decisions that they become the priority and mission itself.
It is then the same with my walk with God. Like Martha, I'm so caught up and entwined with how to go about being a good christian that I forget that it isn't WHAT I DO that makes me a christian but WHO sustains me that is.
The christian journey is not solely and mainly on how many good deeds I've done. No, it is about the relationship that I have with He that is truly what counts.
Rest
Isn't it apt that death equates to 'resting in peace'?
It is of little wonder that the writer of Philippians 4:7 remarks "And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
What a word to use --- transcends! How important being at peace must be if it is required to safeguard and protect both the emotional and logical aspect of our lives...
Yet, in this world of constant change, turmoil, unrest and uncertainty, this lofty idea of peace seems so far out of reach. Can I honestly say that I've had ever experienced a moment of utter peace before? Presently, probably not since I'm never outside the interminable barrage of the hassles of church, school work, relationship issues and the like.
However, this flight after the unattainable serves a higher purpose, that is --- a goal to perhaps one day, achieve this ineffable calm.
So it is my resolve to give a little more of my precious time this year to sit in the stillness of His presence, hoping to get a little closer in the relentless pursuit of this thing called 'peace'.
It is of little wonder that the writer of Philippians 4:7 remarks "And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
What a word to use --- transcends! How important being at peace must be if it is required to safeguard and protect both the emotional and logical aspect of our lives...
Yet, in this world of constant change, turmoil, unrest and uncertainty, this lofty idea of peace seems so far out of reach. Can I honestly say that I've had ever experienced a moment of utter peace before? Presently, probably not since I'm never outside the interminable barrage of the hassles of church, school work, relationship issues and the like.
However, this flight after the unattainable serves a higher purpose, that is --- a goal to perhaps one day, achieve this ineffable calm.
So it is my resolve to give a little more of my precious time this year to sit in the stillness of His presence, hoping to get a little closer in the relentless pursuit of this thing called 'peace'.
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